


In Your Eyes

by Liyyah



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-26
Updated: 2017-11-16
Packaged: 2018-03-25 22:36:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 19,577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3827500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Liyyah/pseuds/Liyyah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Soulmate AU where everybody is born with heterochromia- your right eye is your natural colour but your left eye is the colour of your soulmate's. And it's only once you meet and recognise your own eye staring back at you that your eyes change to match (inspired by a Tumblr post)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Start Of Something New

Felicity Smoak was born with one eye the colour of the sky and another that resembled the ocean. When she was younger she would often think about the day that one would change colour after meeting her soulmate. She would wonder about him and the kind of person he was and what he looked like. She hoped mint chip was his favourite ice cream flavour too and that he would like her glasses. But then her father left without a second glance and she watched her mother become a shell of who she once was and Felicity never thought about soulmates again.

She began wishing that she didn’t have one. That she was one of the glitches, a mistake made by the universe who didn’t have a partner that was made just for them. Cases were rare but they did exist. Felicity found herself hoping more and more that she was one of them. Each night that she would have to pick her drunken mother up from the bar at two in the morning or listen to her sobs seeping through the too thin walls, she prayed that she would never find her soulmate. She didn’t want anything to do with one.

Oliver Queen didn’t care much for soulmates. He grew up knowing that he would find her some day but that day hadn’t arrived yet so he had as much fun with as much girls as possible before his time came. He didn’t really think about her a lot, in fact he was quite indifferent to the whole thing. Everyone was born with their right eye being their natural colour and the left eye the colour of their soulmate. When you met that person, your eyes changed to match. He had heard the story a million times. He didn’t think it was something great or horrible, it was just the way life was.

But then he watched his mother’s eyes turn grey as she fell to her knees in the middle of a crowded room, her cries echoing off the walls while she broke and he knew that his father was dead. He looked on as she became a ghost of the person she used to be. She stopped smiling and then she stopped crying and it seemed as if she had stopped feeling altogether. When Oliver’s father died, he lost his mother as well and that was the moment he decided that he didn’t want a soulmate. If this was love then he wanted none of it. He started hoping that he would never meet her, that they would never cross paths. Those instances happened once in a blue moon but it was possible and he wished with every fibre of his being that this would be one of those occurrences.

Oliver Queen and Felicity Smoak were not very alike at all. But they certainly had one thing in common. Neither of them ever wanted a soulmate.

Unfortunately, the universe had other ideas.

 

Felicity was hurrying through the wet streets, soaking as the rain poured down. This was the one day she had walked to work because her piece of crap car had refused to start that morning and her purse with her wallet and phone and every other necessity had been forgotten in said car. So much for getting a taxi. She was cursing the world and Mother Nature and all of the supreme beings she could think of as she wondered if her day could possibly get any worse.

Suddenly, she was pulled out of her thoughts as she collided with something hard, her face meeting a broad suit covered chest. She stumbled and was sure that her butt was going to hit the pavement when a hand shot out, fingers wrapping around her arm to steady her. The simple contact caused jolts of electricity to run through her veins and by the way he quickly pulled away as if he had been burned, she knew he felt it too.

Looking up, confusion written on her features, she was met with a pair of eyes that looked exactly like her own. Time came to a complete halt as she stared at the man in front of her, horror slowly filling her as she helplessly watched his eyes turn to match the colour of her left one. She knew that hers was changing too and dread slowly began to suffocate her as she stared into the eyes she had been looking at in the mirror for years.

_This was her soulmate._

The stranger who she was destined to spend the rest of her life with looked at her with an equally terrified expression as it dawned on him who she was. Everything around her disappeared and they were the only two people to exist. The noise and clatter of life and the rain beating against her skin fell away for a moment while her heart raced in her chest and she wondered if he could hear it. Nothing else in the whole universe mattered at that second as the world ceased spinning just for him and her.

Suddenly, she blinked, broken out of her trance as she took a step back as if she had been physically wounded.

“No,” she whispered hoarsely, because she didn’t want this she didn’t want to end up like her mother _no._

That one word repeated in her mind over and over, stuck on a loop because this could not be real. This was a nightmare and she mentally yelled at herself to wake up because it was impossible _no no no._

“I’m sorry,” she said, shaking her head before she swivelled around and darted away as fast as she could. She needed to get away. Her life was falling apart and ripping at the seams and it was all too much. She didn’t look back, no matter how much a part of her was pleading to just turn around. She could already feel a distant ache forming in her stomach as she got further and further away from him and the disease was already taking effect.

She found herself in an alley, leaning against the wall because her legs were giving out as she struggled to breathe with the rope that had tied itself around her neck. Panic was clawing at her insides and she bit her lip to keep from screaming because _this could not be happening._ Her stomach was twisted in knots and she felt as if she was going to throw up. She had just met her soulmate. She tried to wrap her head around the fact because it didn’t seem possible. For years she had managed to convince herself that she didn’t have one and that her day would never come but she was wrong because here it was. She couldn’t do this.

Her eyes fell shut as she tried to regulate her breathing and calm down.  With her arms around herself, clutching at her skin to hold it together, she shivered either because she was drenched or because she was still reeling. She stole a few minutes for herself, calming her heartbeat as she envied everyone around her who continued about their daily lives because she should have been one of them. That was supposed to be her.

Felicity didn’t know how much time had passed before her lungs decided to work again. Forcing herself to stand, she began heading home once more.

 As she walked, she was hit with a pang of regret. Not for her but him. He was the unluckiest person in the world to be paired up with her. She couldn’t help but feel sorry for the man she didn’t even know. She wondered how he was going to explain his eyes. Hell, she didn’t know how she would explain hers. But she didn’t have a lot of people in her life so it shouldn’t be hard. Besides, she didn’t owe anyone an explanation.

It was only after she had finally arrived at her apartment and was curled up in bed, the tendrils of sleep beginning to pull her under, did she allow herself to think of her stranger. She let her thoughts wander to his bright eyes and the way he kept her from falling. His sharp jaw and how he had just the right amount of stubble. The fact that even though she wore heels, he still towered over her. The image of him was blurry, they had both been soaked but it was clear in her memory that the earth had seemed to stand still when he looked at her. For a second, butterflies had taken residence in her chest and the little voice in the back of her head began to whisper that maybe a soulmate wouldn’t be so bad. Maybe it would be nice to feel wanted. Just maybe, they wouldn’t turn out like her parents.

But then reality hit her and she hated herself for even thinking those things. She had made her choices a long time ago. There was no going back now or ever. She desperately hoped that she would never see him again.

 

Oliver wasn’t used to girls running away from him. He usually had the opposite problem. Clearly his soulmate hadn’t gotten the memo. He had never felt as stupid as when she left him alone in the rain as if she couldn’t get away fast enough, not even giving him a chance to say anything. But he didn’t have time for his pride to be hurt because he was too busy being relieved. It seemed she had the same thoughts about soulmates as he did.

Everyone noticed his eyes, surprise written on their features at the sight and jealousy on others. However, he immediately explained about his mystery girl leaving him in the dust only moments after their life changing moment. He told the story a number of times, the words flying off his lips as he played the part of distraught and hurt.

“I see you’re not tired of this bullshit yet,” Thea said to him at another gala after he walked away from a group of his mother’s friends who had asked him of course about his eyes.

His sister was very aware on his views on soulmates and how much he didn’t want one. She on the other hand was still anxiously awaiting hers. A part of him longed to be like her again, to be excited at the prospect of having another half and being in love. But he had witnessed firsthand what the grief over his father had done to his mother and he never wanted that. But Thea was a hopeless optimist and would be able to find a bright side in any situation.

“What? She did run away and leave me in the rain,” he replied. It wasn’t like he was lying.

“Yeah but tone down the theatrics a little,” she mumbled, sipping her champagne.

Thea would always be angry at the mask he put on for the public even though he never said a word about hers.

“Well what am I supposed to say?” he asked. “That I’m actually relieved because I want a soulmate as much as I want a bullet through my brain? That I couldn’t be happier that she headed for the hills because if she didn’t I sure as hell would have?”

The annoyance seeped through his voice and he knew he was being unfair. She just wanted the best for him. But for the past couple days his thoughts had been haunted by a certain blonde with glasses and he couldn’t get her to go away no matter how hard he tried. He kept remembering the way lighting shot through his fingertips when his skin had touched hers and for a second he had been able to breathe again. Even though she had been soaked, she was beautiful. The day had been gloomy but she was colour splashing the dull canvas that was his life. Oliver had spun the story a million times to various people but he failed to mention that his soulmate was breathtaking.

He wasn’t going to admit any of that to his sister though.

“I’m sorry,” she said, her own tone hardening. “I just wish you would try to find her or something.”

“I don’t think she wants to be found,” he replied.

“Maybe she would be good for you,” she continued to argue. “Maybe she’s what you need.”

“I don’t even know her Thea,” he sighed exasperatedly. “And I don’t need anyone.”

He knew that she wanted him to have a happy ending more than anything else but he wasn’t going to be the one to burst her bubble and inform her that those didn’t exist. He stopped believing in fairytales a long time ago. Love was for children.

“I’m just saying that I would rather to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. And you need to let someone in,” she responded, before walking away. They had already been through this but she refused to give up. Oliver knew that he was disappointing her and he hated it but there was nothing else he could do.

As he stared at Thea’s retreating figure, another person came to stand beside him and he was already groaning internally.

“I never thought Oliver Queen would find his soulmate before me,” his best friend said and he merely glared at him because _not today._

“I already got an ear fill from Thea so you can save it,” he replied, heading towards the bar because he really needed a drink right now.

“I wasn’t going to say anything I swear,” Tommy said, holding his arms up in a gesture of mock surrender but Oliver shot him a look.

“Okay fine,” he admitted. “But just one thing.”

“Wait,” Oliver ordered and Tommy silenced until his friend had a drink in his hand.

“Okay go ahead,” he nodded, already downing half his glass.

“You know you can’t hide forever right?” Tommy asked. “You’re going to have to meet her again at some point.”

“I can try,” Oliver responded. “And besides she’s hiding from me too. The universe can’t be that powerful.”

Tommy merely raised his eyebrows, wearing a dubious look and Oliver sighed.

“Just shut up,” he mumbled.

“I didn’t even say anything,” he defended himself but Oliver sent him another look because they both knew he was thinking a lot of things.

“You know how I feel about this Tommy,” he said. “I don’t want to end up like mom.”

A second passed before he added quietly, “And your dad.”

They didn’t talk about Malcolm Merlyn and the person he had become. After Tommy’s mother died he had left Starling for years, abandoning his son and when he returned he was cold. His heart turned to stone, matching his newly grey eyes and Oliver couldn’t help but bring him up.

“That is such bullshit Oliver,” Tommy said forcefully after a few seconds. “You can’t just close yourself off from the world because you _might_ get hurt. Pain is inevitable and you can’t protect yourself from it forever. Even if something like that ever happens to me I won’t become my father because we’re different. I’m not him. And you are not your mother.”

Oliver didn’t say anything because deep down, he knew his friend was right. But he had made his decisions years ago and it was too late to turn back now.

Finally, Tommy sighed, a sad look in his eyes before he got up and walked away, leaving Oliver alone. It seemed that all he was good for was disappointing people who cared about him. If he tried to find his soulmate and fix things with her he would probably end up disappointing her too.

Oliver finished the rest of his drink, thinking bitterly about how he had been told countless times about the tale of soulmates but not one person ever warned him about how it felt to actually meet them. Briefly, she had made his world brighter and as she was hurrying away from him, he had to push down the sudden urge to chase after her. His resolve had wavered and Oliver realised that he was not as strong as he liked to believe.

But his moment of weakness had passed and while he couldn’t seem to get her out of his head, he knew that he wasn’t going to look for her. In fact, he hoped that he would never see her again. After the last bit of alcohol was gone, he made his way over to a group of women who had been eyeing him all night, his public face and smile already put in place. He was desperate to forget the girl whose name he didn’t even know and he would do anything to get his mind off her. And for the rest of the night, no more comment was made about the colour of his eyes.

 

Felicity took a deep breath as she walked into Queen Consolidated, trying to calm her nerves. It was the first day of her new job and everything was going to be fine _she was going to be fine._ That’s what she told herself at least. Steele Industries wasn’t doing well and Walter was forced to lay off a lot of employees, including her. But that didn’t mean that he didn’t try to make sure that everyone was taken care of. The man had a heart of gold.

Apparently Queen Consolidated needed a new head of the Applied Sciences division and Walter and sworn up and down that she was the perfect person for the position. He and the CEO were good friends and while Felicity hated taking handouts, this was Walter, who had become almost like a father to her for the past six years. And she couldn’t really be picky because she needed a damn job.

However she still felt as if she was going to empty the contents of her stomach all over the sleek shiny floor and oh god if she threw up she was going to fling herself off the building. She just hoped that her new boss would be nice. But if he was a friend of Walter’s he had to be a good man right? Oh she certainly hoped.

She made her way over to the receptionist, trying to look as cool and collected as possible.

“Hi I’m Felicity Smoak from Steele Industries, I have an appointment with Mr. Queen,” she said to the woman behind the desk, internally cheering at the fact that her voice didn’t shake.

“Of course,” she replied. “You can go right in.”

The brunette pointed Felicity in the direction of her new boss’ office and she smiled, thanking her before heading to her destination.

Felicity stopped at the doorway, looking around in awe because this was the biggest office she’d ever seen. It was freaking huge. And gorgeous holy shit. She was so distracted that she almost didn’t notice the man standing in the corner, his back to her as he stared out at the city through the glass walls.

Suddenly he swivelled around, alerted by Felicity’s heels clicking against the floor as she entered the room and every single moment dropped dead because none of them would ever be able to compare to this one.

Felicity stared into the all too familiar eyes of the man she had met in the rain and oh god no.

_Her new boss was her soulmate._

Felicity’s heart stopped beating as they both looked at each other, dumbstruck. She was unable to get words out of her mouth and even if she was, she had no idea what she would say.

Of course her soulmate was Oliver fucking Queen. How the hell had she not realised? Sure it was rainy and she didn’t really get a good glimpse of his face but that same damn face was always plastered on some tabloid or the news she should have known she was so goddamn stupid.

The panic began threatening to take her over again as flashes of her mother bombarded her and all she wanted to do was run. But she couldn’t. She needed a job. If she still had one here because she wouldn’t be surprised if Oliver threw her out of the building right then and told her to never come back.

“I’m sorry,” she blurted out all of a sudden. “About when we met and I ran away and left you I felt awful but I just....I couldn’t do it I’m so sorry.”

The words quickly fell out of her mouth without even consulting her brain first and a little weight was lifted from her shoulders. She had been feeling absolutely terrible about basically abandoning him and even if she couldn’t save her ass, at least she was able to apologise.

“I don’t want a soulmate,” she added quietly, her voice filled with emotion, letting him get just a glance of her vulnerability as she lowered the wall she had built around herself for just a second.

Oliver’s eyes softened as he let out a sigh of what sounded like relief, his horrified expression fading away a bit.

“I don’t want a soulmate either,” he declared and Felicity had never felt so relieved.

“You don’t?” she asked in disbelief, laughter creeping into her voice because this was almost too good to be true.

Oliver nodded in response, a grin of his own present on his features and Felicity ignored the way butterflies flittered about in her stomach when he smiled.

Maybe the universe wasn’t so bad after all.

“So you’re not mad at me and going to throw me out jobless on the streets?” she asked hopefully, causing Oliver to be the one to laugh this time.

“No,” he replied shaking his head and for a moment, a comfortable silence descended over them, covering the pair like a blanket as they stood in the middle of the room, both refusing to admit that they were actually enchanted by the other.

“Well that’s great to hear,” she said, her voice cutting through the air because the way Oliver was looking at her caused warning bells to ring in her head.

He blinked, as if he had been broken out of a spell, looking down at his feet briefly before meeting her eyes again but this time, the fondness was gone from them and in place was the face that always appeared in the news or press conferences. Something shifted inside him and Felicity’s heart ached a little.

But it reminded her to put her own mask back on and they became two people playing pretend once more, lying to the world and to themselves.

“We’re just going to be partners, working together and that’s it,” Oliver stated, his tone businesslike.

“Just partners,” Felicity agreed. “Nothing more.”

Oliver held out his hand to shake on their little deal and Felicity grasped it, trying her best to ignore the surge of electricity that pulsed through every cell in her being, causing her to become a livewire. His persona cracked for a moment, a tiny gasp just barely escaping from his throat at the contact, letting her know he felt it too before he quickly got it together. They then pulled away, watching the other as if they were no more than two people with a common goal when that was the farthest thing from the truth.

Oliver Queen and Felicity Smoak didn’t have a lot in common but they were both stubborn as hell. However they were about to figure out that it was impossible to fight fate. No matter how hard they tried it simply couldn’t be done. Oliver was fire and Felicity was gasoline and they didn’t know it yet but together they would burn the world down. They were both broken with jagged edges but they were the perfect fit for each other, their souls entwined in a way that couldn’t even be explained.

That day, they both silently swore that they wouldn’t fall in love. But they would soon come to learn that no one could outrun destiny.


	2. Falling For You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oliver and Felicity slowly begin falling for one another.

Felicity sighed in her chair as Oliver didn’t pick up the phone for the sixth time. He was supposed to come in two hours ago and while the CEO of Queen Consolidated did have a tendency to be late, he was never _this_ late. And in the weeks that she had been working here, Oliver never missed a day. Despite what the media said, he genuinely cared about his family’s company. Felicity couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong.

She got up from where she was sitting, pacing around the room as she anxiously chewed on her fingernail, deliberating on whether or not to call him again. Felicity was so lost in thought that she didn’t even notice when her, well Oliver’s but they were both sharing him at the moment because she deserved an executive assistant too, EA entered the room.

“Everything alright Miss Smoak?” Gerry asked, causing her to jump out of her skin.

“Don’t sneak up on me like that!” she chastised the younger man, guilt instantly filling her at his wide eyes and nervous expression.

“Sorry,” she apologised, rubbing at her temple. “Oliver’s late and he isn’t picking up his phone and I’m a little worried.”

“Oh, um he usually doesn’t come in on this day,” Gerry explained, seeming a bit uncomfortable.

“Why?” Felicity asked curiously. “What’s today?”

“It’s the anniversary of Robert Queen’s death,” he replied and Felicity immediately felt like a fool.

Of course. How could she forget? The solemn mood of everyone in the building was suddenly explained. If she had bothered to look at a paper or any news site really she would have seen it blaring at her but she had been late that morning and as soon as she arrived to work, she was too busy sorting out files and reports that she should have been working on the night before.

Felicity groaned as her worry for her boss increased tenfold now that she knew why he wasn’t at work. She had enough experience with days like this herself to know how awful they were.

Finally making up her mind, her more emphatic side winning the internal argument that waged inside her head, she began belting out instructions to her EA.

“You’re in charge for the rest of the day,” she announced. “We had only two meetings scheduled for today but neither of them is really that important just tell them something came up. Lie. I don’t know just make it believable. Same thing goes for anyone who calls.”

“Wait!” Gerry stopped her just as she was darting out of the office, looking absolutely overwhelmed. “Where are you going?”

“To make sure Oliver’s alright,” she confessed before quickly walking away.

He didn’t say anything else as she hurried out the door. Good. Felicity was all too aware of what people said about her because she was Oliver’s soulmate. Everyone had seen her eyes the minute she began working there and the whispers had instantly erupted. They said that she didn’t deserve the position. That despite her and Oliver’s protests, they were obviously sleeping together. That there was no way that their relationship was purely platonic. Felicity had learned to ignore them all but sometimes it was hard. She didn’t need any more rumours flying around about her and Oliver. Besides, there wasn’t an ounce of truth to them anyway.

Felicity had briefly been to the Queen mansion before. She had needed to drop off some urgent paperwork that he had forgotten at the office and while Gerry had offered to do it himself, he didn’t put up much of a fight when Felicity insisted that it wasn’t a problem. They both knew that the security in front of the gates would let her in easier than him. Soulmate privileges.

As she walked in the direction that the guard had pointed her towards, she couldn’t help but marvel at the mansion and its enormity, not to mention the sprawling grounds. It really was unbelievable.

Suddenly, her step faltered as she spotted Oliver in the distance, crouched in front of a headstone that could only belong to one person. Nerves began slowly eating away at her as she wondered if she had made a mistake. Maybe she shouldn’t have come here. What if she was crossing a line? Maybe she should just turn around and go back to QC.

But before she could make a decision, Oliver’s head swivelled around in her direction, almost as if he sensed her. Maybe he did, the same way that she was able to tell that he was not okay. However she quickly pushed those thoughts aside as she continued making her way towards him.

“Hey,” she said gently, kneeling next to him.

“Hey,” he replied, trying to smile but failing.

He was dressed in a suit, indicating that he had planned on showing up to work that morning. That obviously had not worked out.

“What are you doing here?” he asked, a tiny crease forming in between his forehead and for some reason Felicity had to hold herself back from reaching out and smoothening it.

“I was kind of worried when you didn’t show up to work and wasn’t answering your phone and-”

“Wait what time is it?” he cut her off, looking even more confused.

“Around lunchtime,” she answered softly.

Oliver’s eyes widened as he pulled his phone out of his pocked, staring at the time for himself.

“I had my phone on silent,” he mumbled, Felicity’s missed calls glaring at him.

“I’m so sorry,” he apologised as he looked up at her. “I didn’t realise it was so late-”

“Oliver,” she interrupted him because she couldn’t stand the look on his face.

Oliver Queen had never looked so lost.

“It’s alright.”

Her heart bled a little for the man in front of her, the one who had lost his father too early and spent his days missing him. Not the man that the media and rest of the world had created. He was merely a boy again, grieving for a man who wasn’t here anymore.

They didn’t say anything else, letting a comfortable blanket of silence wrap around them. Felicity’s blonde hair blew in the wind and she could hear birds chirping happily. The sky above them was astoundingly blue. It should have been a sin that a day so beautiful could be so sad.

“Tell me about your father,” she said tentatively, her request almost getting lost in the breeze.

For a moment, the corners of Oliver’s mouth just barely turned up.

“He was great. Amazing. I remember when he took me and my best friend to our first baseball game when we were eleven. We were so excited it was embarrassing. And after the game he carried us to this place with the most greasy unhealthy food. It was the best. And I always remember Christmas. He loved Christmas. We would all decorate the tree together and bake gingerbread cookies. It was the only time of the year that we stepped foot into that kitchen and it always led to me and Thea having a flour fight and getting kicked out.”

Felicity giggled because she could definitely imagine a younger Oliver causing trouble with his little sister. But she knew for a fact that the other Queen wasn’t so innocent either.

“He used to hang mistletoe everywhere just so he would have an excuse to kiss mom. Thea and I would always complain about gross they were,” Oliver said, a hint of laughter in his voice but there was something else there too. A bit of sadness or longing.

_He used to want that._

Suddenly it made sense why Oliver didn’t want a soulmate. He spent years watching his parents, secretly wishing for what they had and then his father died and he realised that love was just a curse. They weren’t so different after all.

Oliver blinked, as if coming out of a trance and Felicity could already see that he was going to put his mask back on again and shut himself off from the world. But she didn’t want to say goodbye to this Oliver just yet.

So she lowered the walls that she had built around herself, just for a little while.

“My dad left us when I was little,” she said, the words tumbling out of her mouth before her brain could catch up and command them to stop.

 She looked down, plucking at a piece of grass and twirling it around between her finger and thumb as she spoke, staring at it so she wouldn’t have to look at Oliver.

“I don’t remember the day that he left but I remember his birthday. I could never forget that damn date. That day to me is what today is to you I guess. Me and mom would bake him a cake every year and he used to laugh and say that there was nothing more that he could wish for. That we were everything he needed. So he used to pull me on his lap and let me blow out the candles and make my own wish.”

_Maybe I should have wished for him to stay._

Felicity swallowed the sentence that was on the tip of her tongue, almost forgetting herself and letting him see too much.

“So, in a way I understand,” she said instead. “And I’m sorry.”

Without any warning, Oliver placed his hand in hers, interlocking their fingers and Felicity bit her lip to keep from gasping at the sudden contact and the electricity that began pulsing through her veins.

“I’m sorry too,” he said quietly, causing Felicity to gently squeeze his hand, letting him know that she was there for him, that he could trust her and that it would be okay. One tiny gesture of comfort that spoke a million words.

She wasn’t sure how long they stayed there, hand in hand as they both sat in front of Oliver’s father’s grave. But that was the day something shifted for Oliver and Felicity. They didn’t know it yet but they were no longer just business partners. They had already begun to become something more. Briefly, they had let the other person get a glimpse of who they were underneath all of the pretence. And that was all that it took. All of a sudden, Oliver Queen and Felicity Smoak slowly began to fall for each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I finally got around to writing another part for this (my exams are over and stuff yay!) so I hope everyone likes it. I already have another part waiting to post it just needs to be edited and stuff. I was going to merge them both into one but it wasn't flowing very well so I just separated them into two. Anyway thank you for reading and feedback is greatly appreciated! :)


	3. Home Is Where The Heart Is

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Sometimes home isn't a place at all, but two eyes and a heartbeat"

Oliver grabbed his keys, ready to head to Felicity’s place for movie night. He wasn’t sure when or how they had started hanging out but he didn’t question it. Oliver found that he liked spending time with the blonde. They went out to a couple places together, usually after work to unwind but Oliver’s favourite was their weekly movie nights every Saturday. He loved going to Felicity’s place. It was warm and cozy and actually felt like home.

As he flung open the door however, he was met with the woman in question on the other side, hand raised in the air, ready to knock.

“Oh,” she said, surprised at Oliver’s sudden appearance. “Hi.”

“Hey,” he replied. “What are you doing here?”

“Well we always have movie night at my place and you live in a freaking mansion so I thought why not do something different,” she elaborated.

“Oh, sure,” Oliver responded, trying his best to sound as if he didn’t mind this new arrangement.

“That’s not a problem is it?” Felicity asked, her eyes widening in worry behind her glasses. Of course she would be able to sense that he wasn’t telling the truth.

“No, not at all. Come on in,” he ushered her inside, plastering a smile on his face to convince her that it was fine.

He didn’t want her to think that she wasn’t welcome in his house or that he was annoyed with her or anything. It was just that someone like Felicity, someone so full of light didn’t belong in a place so cold.

“So what are we watching tonight?” she inquired as she plopped down on the couch next to him.

“I don’t know,” he shrugged. “You’re the one with good movie taste.”

“And yet you fell asleep when I picked Lord Of The Rings last week,” she teased.

“I did not!” he protested even though they both knew that was one big fat lie.

“You were snoring,” she grinned at him and Oliver ignored the butterflies that fluttered about in his stomach. All was right in the world when Felicity smiled.

“I don’t snore,” he denied with a smile of his own.

But before Felicity could argue further, they were interrupted by Thea entering the room.

“Hey. How come you guys are here?” she asked curiously.

Thea knew Oliver well enough to be aware that he would never willingly bring Felicity to the place where ghosts of the past constantly haunted him.

“Felicity decided that we should have movie night at the Queen mansion,” Oliver answered.

“Ooh what are we watching?” the younger Queen questioned excitedly as she joined them on the couch.

“We?” Oliver raised an eyebrow at his sister, causing her to roll her eyes.

“Yes, _we._ Someone needs to make sure that you don’t pick a movie that bores Felicity to death,” proclaimed Thea.

“Hey she was the one who put me to sleep last week!” he exclaimed, unable to stop the corners of his mouth from turning up as Felicity’s eyes gleamed triumphantly at his admission.

“Just go make popcorn while we choose a movie,” Thea obnoxiously ordered her brother.

“Please,” added Felicity with that adorable little smile on her face. The one she was quickly beginning to realise would get Oliver to do anything she wished.

“Fine,” he sighed, before getting up to head to the kitchen.

Oliver couldn’t deny either Thea or Felicity so putting them together was a very bad combination.

“But I am not watching The Notebook again,” he warned his sister.

“You love The Notebook and you know it,” Thea smirked.

“No I do not!” he called as he walked out of the room.

“Oliver cries every single time he watches it I swear,” Thea whispered to Felicity as he was leaving but he still heard her.

He shook his head in exasperation, hoping that Felicity knew better than to believe a single word that came out of his sister’s mouth.

After preparing their snack, he made his way back into the living room just in time to see the opening scene of The Breakfast Club.

“I can live with this,” he mumbled, taking his seat next to Felicity who instantly grabbed the entire bowl of popcorn. Oliver had discovered that Felicity had a tendency to hog movie snacks. Any snack really, even though she refused to admit it.

However, about halfway into the movie, Oliver felt something hit him in the face. He blinked in surprise before his eyes found the popcorn that had fallen on his lap. He immediately glared at Thea who had her eyes glued to the screen, the perfect picture of innocence. But Oliver knew that look all too well.

Without a second thought, he flung one in her direction, intent on getting revenge. Only, he missed and it hit Felicity instead.

“Hey!” she yelled as the snack landed on her chest after smacking her nose.

“I’m so sorry that was supposed-”

But Oliver’s apology was cut short by Felicity pelting several popcorn right back at him. And then all hell broke loose.

In a matter of minutes, the three of them were engaged in a full on popcorn war, throwing the tiny things at one another as their squeals and laughter echoed loudly throughout the room. Suddenly, Oliver was fifteen years old again with not a care in the world as he and Thea fought with handfuls of flour, running around the kitchen like they were insane. Strangely, as Felicity and Thea relentlessly attacked him, Oliver actually felt truly happy. He couldn’t remember the last time he had laughed so much. Even Thea seemed lighter than usual. Oliver was almost reminded of the days when his father was alive, when his family was whole.

“Ahem,” a familiar voice sounded out of nowhere.

The adults behaving like children all looked up to find Moira Queen standing over the couch, an almost disapproving look on her face if she had been able to mask the glimmer in her eyes.

“Mom!” Thea exclaimed, instantly dropping the batch of popcorn she was clutching back into the bowl.

She looked the way he felt, like a kid who had just been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. His mother had that effect. Even Felicity appeared sheepish.

“I hope you all know that you’ll be cleaning this up yourselves,” Moira stated, gesturing at the mess that they made.

They all nodded seriously, although after years of this same routine, Oliver could tell that Thea was already planning on how to conveniently disappear before the movie was over.

“I love this movie,” Moira said with a little smile as she squeezed herself in the small space next to Thea.

“Really? I didn’t know that,” Thea said, disbelief written on her features at the fact that Moira was actually joining them.

Oliver’s mother usually spent her evenings in bed, embracing solitude ever since Robert’s accident. She didn’t spend a lot of time with her children, unless they were all required to attend some gala or public event.

Thea’s eyes lit up as she was a little girl again, hungry for her mother’s attention as she listened attentively while Moira began telling her about her favourite parts. It wasn’t long before Felicity joined in the conversation as well. And as Felicity started babbling excitedly about her own favourite movies, Moira grinned in a way that Oliver hadn’t seen in so long.

Their voices filled the room, and for a moment, the big empty mansion actually felt alive once more. The warm cozy feeling that Oliver usually felt at Felicity’s place settled over him.

_It felt like home again._

Maybe it wasn’t Felicity’s house that made him feel like he was home. Maybe it was just Felicity. But Oliver quickly pushed those thoughts aside, refusing to dwell on them for even a second. He and Felicity were just friends. Nothing more.

Soon, he joined them, teasing Thea about her love for cheesy Romance movies while she shot back that he wouldn’t know a good movie if it hit him in the face. Felicity rolled her eyes as she told them that were acting like five year olds and Moira loudly whispered to her that Oliver was forever provoking his little sister, to which Thea smiled smugly and Oliver huffed.

Briefly, Oliver remembered what life was like once upon a time, before the world had broken them all. He remembered what it was like to feel at peace, to have happiness right at his fingertips. He knew it was only temporary, that Felicity would leave and his mother would retreat to her icy fortress and the walls would suffocate him like they did every single day.

But for now, everything was perfect. And that was more than Oliver had ever dared to hope for.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually didn't plan on posting today but I don't know if I'll get a chance tomorrow so here's chapter 3! I haven't even started writing the next part yet so I don't know when that will be up (please be patient with me) Anyway I want to say thank you for the amazing response I got on the last chapter you all are wonderful! Thank you so much for reading and I hope you liked it :)


	4. I Never Meant To Fall In Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felicity realises that she's in love with Oliver.

Felicity was sprawled out on the couch, basically inhaling her dinner as she listened to Oliver relate the story of the time that a young Thea had caught him and Tommy getting drunk in his room.

“I had to buy her silence by taking her to the playground whenever she wanted for the next month. She was six and blackmailing me,” Oliver complained but couldn’t hide the smile on his face as he relayed the memory.

“Well you and Tommy aren’t exactly the smartest guys on the planet,” she grinned as she ducked to avoid the piece of chicken that he flung in her direction.

“For your information I run a multibillion dollar company I am very smart,” he huffed.

Oliver Queen was adorable when he was pouting.

Felicity blinked, pushing aside that little thought and burying it at the back of her head. That was happening more and more lately, stray unwanted thoughts about Oliver as she observed tiny details about him and seemingly unimportant mannerisms that actually meant a lot to her.

She always knew when he was nervous because he would rub his forefinger and thumb together. She noticed that his public smile was very different than the one he reserved for his mother, sister, best friend and _her,_ because his eyes always lit up for them. The Oliver she had come to know could disappear in a second, replaced by the persona of billionaire playboy CEO and she could tell the exact moment that the switch had been flipped.

Little by little, Felicity had discovered Oliver Queen, the mask he wore being slowly chipped away as she found the real man underneath and as much as she tried to ignore it, at the back of her mind she knew that she was falling for him.

“Very very smart,” she assured him, stealing one his fries while he pretended not to notice.

He had given up on trying to get her to stop her thievery of his food a long time ago.

“I’m telling Tommy what you said though,” Oliver threatened but Felicity merely rolled her eyes because Oliver’s best friend was the human equivalent of a puppy.

“What’s he gonna do?” she asked. “Throw food at me too?”

“You’ll find out when you see him next weekend,” Oliver replied, ignoring her little jab.

Felicity groaned as she suddenly remembered the gala that she was required to attend. She wanted to go to that event as much as she wanted to go to a funeral.

“Do I really have to go?” she asked for the millionth time, already knowing his answer.

“Yes you do,” he replied, his eyes softening as he took in her nervous expression. “We _both_ need to represent the company.”

“It’ll be fine. I’ve been going to those things for as long as I can remember and so far I’ve survived,” he reassured her.

“Yeah but you’re _Oliver Queen_ ,” she responded.

“And you’re Felicity Smoak. You are remarkable. The most intelligent person that I know. You’re amazing and a little event like this is nothing.”

Felicity nodded as she focused very hard on putting her plate on the coffee table in order to avoid his gaze so he wouldn’t see her blush.

“And I’ll be with you the whole time,” he added gently.

They both knew the real reason Felicity was so opposed to going to the gala was the whispers that would be flying around about her and Oliver. She had gotten better at dealing with them at work but at such a huge charity event crawling with hounds bloodthirsty for gossip, she was terrified.

“Thank you,” she said softly, finally meeting his eyes.

A warm feeling wrapped around her heart as she got lost in them, forgetting the world for a few moments, forgetting herself as time seemed to slow down.

“I have absolutely nothing to wear though,” she said, breaking the silence because the way Oliver was looking at her was dangerous.

“I think Thea said something about taking you shopping Friday evening,” he declared nonchalantly, leaning back on the couch as he pretended that he hadn’t just been staring at her like she was the sun in his universe.

“She’ll drag me to a bunch of stores where I can’t afford anything,” Felicity snorted, because he wasn’t the only one who could pretend.

“Take my credit card. The company one I mean...the one that I use for company purchases, that one,” Oliver rambled quickly after Felicity’s eyes widened considerably at his initial suggestion.

“It is for a company event after all.”

“It’s okay, you don’t have to do that,” Felicity replied hastily.

Oliver lending her his credit card was too much, too intimate, and Felicity had to focus on keeping her breathing intact before she lost it.

“Felicity,” Oliver said tenderly, the mere sound of his voice already calming her wild heartbeat as he uttered her name in the way that only he did.

Felicity adored the way that her name rolled off Oliver’s tongue. It was just four syllables but Oliver conveyed it to mean so much more. A simple _hello_ when he saw her first thing in the morning or a frustrated _I’m going to lose my mind_ as they spent hours into the night at the office, pouring over file after file. Her name meant _please stop talking now_ as she babbled about something inappropriate while he raised his eyebrow, unable to hide an amused smirk and a _thank you_ with an expression filled with pride and nod of approval after she had outdone herself in a meeting.

Oliver said her name with purpose or languidly, because he felt like it but either way, Felicity had never heard her name fall like that from anyone’s lips before.

This time, he said her name with the underlying meaning of _it’s okay_. Just one word and the panic that had threatened to consume her immediately disintegrated.

Oliver saw right through her and no one else understood her reservations of getting too close more than him.

So she let out a breath, shooting him a tiny smile before he returned her gesture, letting her know that he understood.

“I’ll probably just raid Thea’s closet,” Felicity joked, thankful that he had dropped the subject.

“You’ll get lost in there, I’m warning you,” Oliver replied rather knowingly.

“Did you get lost in your sister’s closet?” Felicity grinned widely.

“No,” Oliver scoffed but wouldn’t look her in the eyes.

Felicity let out a bubble of laughter, ready to tease him about this too when he cut her off by hurling one of the throw pillows at her.

“You are such a child!” she exclaimed before she threw it right back at him, his wicked smile that mirrored her own causing flowers to bloom in her chest.

He was a damn child. But she loved him all the more for it.

Suddenly, all of the oxygen left Felicity’s body as that one fleeting thought repeated itself over and over in her brain, forcing the realisation onto her so that she couldn’t avoid it any longer.

_She loved him._

Felicity’s mind started working at a thousand miles per second as she tried to figure out how this could have happened and pinpoint the exact moment that it did but she was at a loss. Somewhere in the middle of the movie nights and after work dinners and lunches with Oliver and his sister and lounging around on Sundays with him and his best friend Felicity had fallen in love with him. He invited her into his world and she made a home in it. She found a family in it.

Felicity knew that she had feelings for Oliver, it was impossible to deny but she never fathomed the depth of her emotions. But now she knew. And she couldn’t ignore it.

“Are you alright?” Oliver’s question broke her out of her spell and she looked up to find him watching her worriedly.

“Yeah I-I’m fine,” the words stumbled out of her mouth but she could tell that he wasn’t convinced. He knew that something was wrong.

But Felicity didn’t know how she could even begin to explain what she had just realised. She didn’t know how he would react either. After all, he had never wanted a soulmate in the first place.

However, as Oliver continued to stare at her with an expression filled with concern, the little voice in the back of Felicity’s mind whispered that maybe he loved her too.

For a moment, Felicity could almost see it all. She confessing her feelings to Oliver and him miraculously reciprocating them. His lips on hers as she finally found out what he tasted like. Her being adorned in white and walking down an aisle to meet Oliver at the other end. A house filled with the laughter of little kids. It was so clear. That could be her reality.

_Everything she had secretly ever wanted._

In an instant, she forgot each thing she told herself for the past nineteen years. Every caution she had ever taken was thrown out the window.

And as she opened her mouth, ready to say those three little words and just get it over with, her phone rang.

The sound abruptly shattered the silence and Felicity blinked, brought back down to earth, horrified with herself as the full realisation of what she had been about to do hit her like a tidal wave.

Without wasting a second, she grabbed her phone, desperate for a distraction as she struggled to ground herself and get a hold of reality.

“Hello,” she answered, ignoring her racing heart.

“Is this Felicity Smoak?” an unfamiliar voice asked.

“Yes, who is this?”

“This is Starling City’s General Hospital. Your mother’s been in an accident.”

And just like that, with only one sentence, Felicity’s entire world fell apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to say thank you to everyone for sticking with this story so far I have never written a multichapter fic before so I kind of have no idea what I'm doing but I've gotten an amazing response so thank you all so much. Again, I haven't even started on the next chapter but I'll try to update soon I promise. Reviews are greatly appreciated! I love you guys :)


	5. Save Your Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felicity tries to save herself from getting hurt. But it's already too late.

“Felicity,” Oliver’s voice just barely broke her out of her thoughts.

Her mother was in the hospital. She had been in an accident. Those words kept repeating themselves in her mind over and over and everything was spinning out of control and she couldn’t stop it she couldn’t do anything.

“Talk to me Felicity.”

His words sounded like a plea as he looked at her with a worried expression.

“My mom,” she finally managed to get out. “She’s in the hospital. An accident.”

Saying out loud made it real. It made it true. A part of Felicity wished she had never spoken.

Without a reply, Oliver got up, rushing out the door and leading her to his car before they headed to the hospital. Everything was a blur as Oliver drove like a madman on the road. She couldn’t help but wonder if his recklessness would cause them to end up in the hospital too. Wouldn’t that be ironic? The thought almost made her laugh. Oh god she was losing her mind. This was hysteria wasn’t it?

Invisible fingers closed around her throat, choking her as her eyes burned with tears. Panic desperately clawed at her stomach and she couldn’t breathe. She kept thinking about what she would do if Donna wasn’t alright but she didn’t know she didn’t think she’d even be able to survive that her mother had to be okay. She needed to be okay.

Suddenly, without even taking his eyes off the road, Oliver grabbed her hand, intertwining their fingers. As always, the simple touch sent jolts of electricity rushing through every cell in her body. He gently squeezed her hand and Felicity was transported back to the day that they sat in front of his father’s gravestone. Once again, one tiny gesture spoke a million words. Without saying anything, he let her know that he was there for her, that she could trust him and that it would be okay, in the same way she had done for him.

_No matter what happened, she had Oliver._

The realisation sunk in, and just like that, it was easier to breathe.

It felt like years before they finally pulled up at the old building and Felicity wasted no time in jumping out of the car. She had to see her mother. Her heart was racing in her chest as she walked through the doors of Starling City General Hospital, Oliver’s hand still clasped tightly in hers. It was the only thing keeping her sane at the moment.

Felicity felt as if she was dreaming as she frantically walked towards the woman behind the desk in the Emergency Room.

“I’m Felicity Smoak my mom’s Donna Smoak she’s been in an accident,” she blurted out, slightly breathless.

The brunette carelessly flipped through some files and Felicity wanted to scream. No one should be calm right then. Her whole universe was unravelling at the seams her mother had been in an accident nothing was okay and _this damn woman was looking at papers as if she didn’t have a care on earth._

“I’m sorry but she’s currently in surgery. I don’t have any more information at the moment but we will let you know when you’ll be able to see her,” she eventually replied, sounding as if she was underwater as Felicity’s world threatened to fade away.

Her legs felt like jelly as she made her way towards the waiting room that they had been pointed towards and collapsed in a chair.

A block of ice had formed in the pit of her belly and it wouldn’t go away. She wanted to throw up. She wanted to wake up from this awful nightmare. She wished with all her heart that she was five years old again and could jump into her parents’ bed whenever she was frightened. She wanted her mother to tell her that everything would be okay but her mother wasn’t there.

_What if she was never there again?_

As she struggled to breathe, her eyes fell on her and Oliver’s hands still tangled together.

And maybe it was the fact that she couldn’t hold it in anymore or that she had forgotten what it was like to have a shoulder to lean on but Felicity finally let herself cry.

The first sob escaped her throat and before she knew it she was in Oliver’s arms, letting him hold her as she soaked his shirt in tears. She clutched him fiercely, as if her life depended on it as she burrowed her face into his chest, hiding from the world. Briefly, she felt safe. With Oliver’s arms wrapped around her, a sliver of warmth crept into her veins, slowly melting away the ice in her stomach. Felicity was drowning and Oliver was the only person who could rescue her.

Without warning, she was reminded of her realisation only earlier that night.

_She loved him._

But she quickly pushed the thought out of her mind. She had more pressing matters to deal with.

Felicity cried and cried until all her tears ran out and she exhausted herself. All the while, Oliver didn’t say anything. He didn’t make false promises or claims, instead silently letting her know that whatever happened, he would be right by her side.

For years, Felicity had been the one that her mother leaned on, the one who offered comfort and support. She had almost forgotten what it felt like to have someone take care of her. She had forgotten how much she missed it. All he did was hold her but that meant everything to Felicity.

Even after her tears had stopped and she could finally breathe again, Felicity didn’t move, continuing to rest her head against Oliver. She broke almost every rule about getting too close but she didn’t give a damn. She needed him.

Felicity Smoak needed Oliver Queen like she needed air.

A blanket of silence covered them for a few minutes before Felicity spoke.

“I’m scared Oliver,” she confessed, her words a mere whisper.

He looked at her with a storm brewing in his eyes, a helpless expression on his features. Felicity knew that seeing her like this was killing him. He wanted to make it better but he didn’t know how. Felicity didn’t know how to tell him that he already had. That simply his presence was getting her through this whole ordeal.

“I know,” he replied softly. “But it’ll be okay.”

“You don’t know that. You don’t know that she’s gonna come out of this okay.”

“I don’t know if she’ll be okay. But I know that no matter what happens, _you_ will be.”

The force of his words nearly knocked her over. His unwavering faith in her was almost terrifying.

“No I won’t,” she objected. “I can’t lose her if I do I’ll go out of my mind.”

“You’ll survive Felicity,” Oliver muttered, the way her name fell from his lips causing her to shiver. “Because you are without a doubt the strongest person I know.”

Somehow he ended up cupping her cheek, and his fingers against her skin was setting off sparks in every direction.

_The strongest person I know._

Felicity wondered if she should tell him that she thought that exact thing about him. But she was lost in his deep blue eyes and couldn’t seem to find words. Their faces were only inches away from each other and his lips were so close to hers and her heart was pounding so loudly in her chest she hoped he couldn’t hear it.

As Oliver stared at her as if she was the only source of light in his world, it slowly dawned on her that he loved her too. He didn’t need to say it. Neither of them did. Felicity had come to realise that they didn’t need words. But in the waiting room of a hospital, staring into the eyes of the man she loved, Felicity knew it in her bones that he felt the same way.

All of a sudden, Felicity’s surroundings slipped away. It all disappeared, the light chatter of everyone around her, the heavy weight on her shoulders that had been present ever since she received that phone call from hell as the earth came to a halt just for them. In those seconds, all she knew was Oliver.

She began to lean in, her breath coming in short gasps now, when abruptly, they were interrupted.

“Miss Smoak?” a voice called out and Felicity swiftly pulled away from Oliver as reality slapped her in the face.

Oliver had a tendency to make her forget about the world around her. By the way he was rapidly blinking and struggling to regulate his own breathing, Felicity could tell that she had the same effect on him.

She wasn’t too sure how that made her feel. Or at least that’s what she told herself as she pointedly ignored a swell of pride.

“Yes?” she replied, clearing her throat as she stood up.

“I’m Dr. Ramirez. Your mother’s going to be fine,” the man in front of her replied with a little smile, and Felicity let out a breath she didn’t even realise she had been holding.

“Really?” she asked, still unable to believe it but when he nodded, she couldn’t help the wide grin that covered most of her face. Even Oliver was smiling like an idiot.

Her mother was going to be okay.

“She sustained a broken leg but we began working on it as soon as she came in so that will heal beautifully. She also hit her head but that was very minor.”

Felicity barely listened to him as relief filled every inch and crevice of her being and happiness wrapped itself around her heart.

Oliver instead, was the one attentively paying attention to the doctor’s words and Felicity had never been so glad to have him with her.

_She hoped he stayed by her side forever._

Felicity quickly shook her head at that thought, pushing it out of her mind as she focused on what the doctor was saying. He told her that she could visit her mother now and gave her the room number and Felicity was just about to rush off with Oliver in tow when he stopped her.

“Oh..um I’m sorry I almost forgot,” he said, appearing slightly uncomfortable. “I would suggest getting your mother into an AA group. And closely monitoring her as well.”

“Wait..why what are you talking about?” Felicity asked confusedly, her heartbeat beginning to quicken as she could already see where this was going.

“Your mother was driving drunk,” he replied gently. “That was how she ended up losing control of her car.”

Felicity didn’t say anything, rooted to the spot as he awkwardly walked away.

A feeling of numbness washed over her before it was replaced by anger. She was angry at Donna for being so stupid and angry with herself for not being there more for her. She was angry at her father for leaving.

“Are you okay?” Oliver inquired worriedly and another flash of anger coursed through her as she met his eyes.

She was angry at the whole soulmate system.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, his voice filled with concern, always filled with _goddamn concern_ as he stepped closer to her.

She immediately took a step back, pretending she didn’t notice his hurt expression.

“Felicity,” this time he spoke her name with the underlying message of _please let me in_.

But she was done letting him in.

“My mother only started drinking after my father left,” she said, unable to keep her voice from wavering.

Oliver eyes fell shut for a second as he understood, after all he always saw right through her. When they opened again, he gave her a look fill with sorrow.

Another pang of anger hit her because she didn’t want his pity and she held on to it, letting it fuel her.

“You need to go Oliver,” she said, her voice steely.

They both knew she was referring to more than the hospital. He needed to get out of her life.

“Felicity you’re being unreasonable,” he responded, a hint of panic coating every syllable.

“I promised myself that I would never turn out like her. I never wanted to be the woman crying at the darkest hour of the night for someone who was never coming back.”

“That won’t be you.”

“You can’t promise that Oliver!” she exclaimed, biting back tears.

“You’re not gonna lose me,” he replied, placing his hands on her shoulders.

Her anger melted away instantly, the moment his skin touched hers. Felicity had spent most of her life being afraid to care for anybody in fear that they would walk away. She wanted to believe him more than anything else but she couldn’t.

“Sometimes you don’t always have a choice. Your dad didn’t.”

She could see the pain that flashed across his features and her heart twisted a little in her chest.

“I need you to go,” she whispered.

“I’m not leaving you alone like this,” he replied stubbornly.

“I don’t care about you like that Oliver,” she said suddenly, hating herself as the words tumbled out.

“What?” he asked as his hands fell from her shoulders like if he had been burned and this time it was he who took a step back.

“I know you have feelings for me. But I don’t feel that way about you,” she said harshly, twisting the knife into his gut as she watched him bleed all over the hospital floor.

“I never wanted a soulmate. Nothing’s changed,” she declared, and as he stared at her like a wounded animal she knew that she would never be able to forgive herself for this.

But then his expression was replaced by one of anger and he spat harsh words right back at her.

“You forgot that I never wanted a soulmate either. You didn’t change anything.”

But Oliver couldn’t lie as convincingly as her and they both knew that he was wrong.

He turned around, walking away without so much as a second glance and Felicity was glad. Her heart had shattered like glass and the pieces were stabbing at her insides but she didn’t care, she welcomed the pain. She deserved it.

She began heading to her mother’s room, feeling as if she was on autopilot. She felt strange without Oliver’s hand in hers. She was going to have to get used to that. He would never hold her hand again.

Felicity almost didn’t notice when she reached her destination. She entered the room and sat on the little chair beside the bed that her mother lay unconscious, feeling hollow.

She stared at the older blonde. Donna’s closed eyes made her seem almost peaceful. But Felicity knew that was far from the truth. As she looked at her mother, she told herself that it was better this way, a life without Oliver. Now, she would have more time to devote to her mother. She did need to get her help with her drinking problem. Felicity should have done that years ago. But she would do it now. She would take care of her. Help her heal.

But as she listed all the things she would be able to do without the distraction of Oliver, the tears she had been holding back ever since she broke his heart finally came streaming down her cheeks.

She wasn’t all cried out after all.

Felicity took her mother’s hand in her own as she broke her last rule, finally admitting the words she had promised she would never say out loud.

“I love him,” she whispered. “I love him mom.”

She repeated the words over and over, getting it out of her system as she vowed never to speak them again. She vowed never to shed a tear over him again. She wouldn’t turn out like her mother. Or like Oliver’s mother either. She would save herself from that heartache.

But what Felicity didn’t realise yet was that it was already too late for her. The moment she ripped Oliver’s heart out, hers broke too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As usual thanks for reading! I'm going out of the country on Friday for like three weeks so I won't be posting for a while sorry about that. I also hurried this down last night because I wanted to post something before I went away so I apologise for the quality or any mistakes. Anyway thanks again and I really appreciate all the comments and stuff that you guys leave they always make my day. Love you! :)


	6. Letting Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thea meets her soulmate and Oliver makes a decision.

It had been about a week since Felicity told Oliver that she didn’t have the same feelings for him as he did for her. A week since she had kicked him out of her life.  A week since she had broken his heart. And it had been the worst week he had ever experienced.

After surviving his father’s death and his mother’s withdrawal from the world, Oliver thought that he was able to handle anything. But obviously he was wrong.

Felicity had stayed away for three days, taking care of her mother herself he assumed, before returning to work. But seeing her again was almost worse than when she had been gone.

Because this Felicity was the one who wore a mask and kept her walls high. The one who talked to him in her formal voice reserved for strangers.

But he was a stranger again wasn’t he?

Or maybe it was her.

Because Oliver certainly didn’t know who the blonde sharing his work space everyday was anymore.

Just like that, every moment they had ever shared seemed to be meaningless. Every bridge they ever built was burned to the ground and Oliver didn’t have time to even salvage some of the ashes.

In the blink of an eye, the source of Oliver’s happiness vanished from his life.

He pretended that everything was fine, that he wasn’t secretly falling apart inside as he continued on with his days as if nothing was wrong but somehow, everyone at QC could sense that something was off, keeping a distance from both him and Felicity whenever it was possible.

And of course, when Thea had noticed a lack of blonde hair at the mansion and a heavy hearted Oliver, she knew that something had happened.

But she had never said a word, silently creeping into her brother’s room with two tubs of ice cream and spoons and a look that said _I’m here for you,_ waiting until he was ready to talk.

But today, it was Oliver who was quietly letting himself into her room after a soft knock on the door so she wouldn’t be startled, armed with mint chip ice cream and a shoulder to lean on.

Only moments ago, Thea had stumbled into the house with puffy eyes and tearstained cheeks.

But even more importantly, her eyes had changed colour.

His baby sister had found her soulmate.

But Thea had barely looked at him, racing to her room and locking herself away and Oliver’s heart broke a little as it dawned on him that the moment she had been waiting for her whole life hadn’t turned out the way she expected.

So doing what she always did, he snuck into her room, gently lowering himself onto her bed. After a few seconds, she looked up from where her head had been buried into her pillow. Wordlessly, Oliver offered one of the tubs and without wasting any time, she grabbed it and began stuffing her face.

Oliver sprawled out next to her, doing the same as he waited for her to speak.

“I met him,” she finally stated, her mouth full. “My soulmate.”

“What happened?” he asked softly.

“He didn’t want anything to do with me. He said he didn’t want a soulmate before he basically left me alone in the street,” she mumbled, staring forcefully into her now empty container because if she so much as blinked, the tears would fall again.

Oliver watched her with a sad expression of his own, wishing that there was a way he could fix this but he couldn’t.

“I ended up with someone just like my brother,” she laughed, a cold note to her voice.

Guilt stabbed Oliver in his stomach before she looked up at him, remorse written on her features.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered.

And then before either of them could say anything else, a sob escaped from her throat. Without thinking twice, Oliver wrapped his arms around her, letting her soak his shirt but not even caring.

He held his sister as she cried and cried because the universe was cruel enough to pair her with someone who was just like him. The bright optimistic girl with another boy who had given up on the world.

It wasn’t fair.

“I hate soulmates,” she rasped against him as she was ten years old again and clutching on to him as she grieved for a father who left too soon and a mother who could barely stand to look at her children because they reminded her too much of what she had lost.

“I know,” Oliver said quietly, running his fingers through her hair the way he used to do in order to comfort her. “Me too.”

Neither of them spoke for a while, letting silence descend upon them as the only sound that could be heard was Thea’s sobs echoing off the walls.

It killed Oliver to see her this way but there was nothing he could do but hold her. He felt helpless in the same way when he had watched his family fall apart after his father’s death, unable to do anything as everything crumbled around him.

Helpless like when he watched Felicity break in front of him at the hospital, admitting that she was scared of losing her mother.

He couldn’t do anything then and he couldn’t do anything now.

“When I saw you and Felicity together it made me want a soulmate even more,” Thea murmured suddenly, her words heavy and Oliver could tell that she was on the verge of sleep.

Ever since she was a little girl, she would always fall asleep after she had cried too much, tiring herself out. This time was no exception.

“You seemed so happy. I wanted someone to make me happy like that. But it’s all over now.”

Oliver wanted to tell her not to give up so easily. After all, the first time he and Felicity met she had run away too. But look at how they turned out.

“I’m sorry Thea,” Oliver said, the usual sadness he carried around increasing tenfold.

“You were right,” she whispered. “About everything.”

Oliver’s throat closed up as his own eyes burned at her words. He had believed that there was no such thing as a happy ending and that soulmates were a curse but he never wanted her to believe it too.

He never wanted her to lose hope. He never wanted her to become like him.

But it was already too late.

 

Oliver made his way into the kitchen, flinging the empty tubs of ice cream in the trash before washing the dirty spoons and putting them away.

He was so lost in thought that he hadn’t heard his mother entering the room, surprise filling him when he turned around to find her leaning against the counter, her arms folded as she watched him.

“Mom,” Oliver blurted out. “Hi.”

Oliver had barely seen her for the past week. It seemed that when Felicity left, she did too.

“Hello Oliver,” Moira said, never taking her eyes off her son.

“What are you doing?” he questioned tentatively.

“I was thirsty,” his mother stated but didn’t make a move and it was clear that she didn’t intend to go anywhere anytime soon.

Oliver returned her look, folding his own arms as he waited for whatever it was that was about to come next.

“So how’s Felicity?” Moira asked nonchalantly, hiding the weight behind her words.

And there it was.

Oliver dropped his arms to his side, sighing in annoyance as he began walking out of the kitchen. He couldn’t do this. Not today. Hell, not ever.

“Oliver,” his mother called out sharply.

Even now, her tone of voice still stopped him in his tracks.

He turned around, clenching his jaw as he once more met her piercing gaze.

“I wouldn’t know. We’re not exactly speaking,” he finally spat out even though she already knew that.

“What happened?” Moira asked gently.

“Since when do you care?” the words flew out of Oliver’s mouth before he could even think and he immediately felt guilty as he saw the flash of hurt across his mother’s features.

She tried to hide it but he noticed.

“I’m sorry,” he apologised even though a little voice at the back of his head whispered that she wouldn’t be hurt if he wasn’t right.

“It’s okay,” Moira replied. “I haven’t been the best mother since Robert died-”

“Mom,” Oliver cut her off because he really didn’t want to do this.

“And I’m the one who should be apologising,” she continued, shooting him a pointed look as if he hadn’t even spoken.

“Not being there for you and your sister when you needed me most was the biggest mistake I ever made,” she said quietly. “But I’m done making those mistakes. And I’m not going to sit back and watch you make your biggest mistake.”

“What are you talking about?” Oliver asked, even though he knew what she was referring to.

“Do you love her?” his mother answered his question with another question in typical Moira Queen fashion, cutting all the crap.

Oliver avoided her eyes, knowing that his mother had the ability to see right through him. It seemed as if it was eternity before he finally responded.

“Yes.”

Just one word that changed everything and nothing.

He loved her.

He had tried to avoid the depth of his feelings for as long as possible but he couldn’t ignore it anymore.

“I love her,” he said out loud, testing out the word as it rolled off his tongue for the first and last time.

 “Then you need to tell her that,” Moira said. “You need to fight for her.”

With those words lingering in the air, she walked away, leaving him alone with his thoughts.

_You need to fight for her._

His mother’s little piece of advice repeated in his mind over and over and soon it became mixed with Felicity’s voice from that fatal night at the hospital.

_I never wanted a soulmate. Nothing’s changed._

His mother told him to fight for her. But what if she didn’t want to be fought for?

They said that if you loved something you should let it go. So for the first time in his life, Oliver made the decision to be selfless. To not think of only himself for once.

And standing in the middle of those lonely walls, he let go of the bit of hope that he had been carrying around since that night that he and Felicity would eventually find their way back to each other. That one day, they would be together.

In that moment, Oliver silently bid Felicity Smoak goodbye, making up his mind to give her the life that she wanted, the life that she truly deserved.

A life without him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look who finally updated! I know I took forever and I'm so sorry but I got sidelined by other stories and I sort of had no idea where to go with this (I still kinda don't ?) but anyway I will try my best to update sooner this time I promise. Thank you so much for reading and being so patient with me!


	7. Mistake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thea and Felicity go shopping and Donna gives her daughter some advice.

Felicity sighed exhaustedly as she looked through yet another rack of dresses, only to find herself unsatisfied with everything she saw. This was the fifth store she and Thea visited and they hadn’t had any luck.

The gala that Felicity had been dreading was tomorrow and she still had nothing to wear. So when Thea called her during lunch and offered to take her shopping after work, she happily obliged. After all she had missed the younger Queen.

“See anything you like?” Thea asked, appearing in front of her.

“Nope,” Felicity replied. “You?”

“Ugh no. I can’t remember the last time shopping has been this stressful. Shopping’s not supposed to be stressful!” Thea complained.

Felicity bit back the words that had been on the tip of her tongue all evening, that maybe there was something else that was bothering her.

When Felicity had seen Thea, she had to stop herself from gasping out loud.

Her eyes had changed colour.

She found her soulmate.

But from the bags under her eyes and the weary expression on her features, Felicity could tell that things didn’t go as she hoped.

However, she didn’t prod, knowing that if Thea wanted to talk about it she would.

Only, Felicity couldn’t stand the sadness in her eyes any longer and decided _screw it._

“Are you okay?” Felicity asked gently.

“What? I’m fine,” Thea instantly answered but refused to meet her gaze, suddenly very interested in the drabbest piece of clothing Felicity had ever seen.

“Thea,” Felicity said in her _don’t bullshit me_ tone of voice that she inherited from her mother and tended to use on Oliver.

Or at least used to. She sometimes forgot that they were barely speaking.

Wordlessly, Thea walked over to one of the little couches in the corner of the room and Felicity ignored the twist of her heart at her sudden remembrance of Oliver as she joined her friend.

“I met my soulmate,” Thea mumbled after Felicity sat down. “As you can already tell.”

“And what happened?” Felicity asked softly.

“He told me that he didn’t want a soulmate. That he didn’t want anything to do with me before he rushed off like he couldn’t get away fast enough. Like I had some sort of contagious disease and he would catch it if he stayed even a second longer.”

“I’m sorry.”

And Felicity was sorry. She knew that Thea spent her entire life excitedly waiting to meet her soulmate.

Yet, in only a matter of seconds, her dreams had been shattered.

“Yeah me too. I always thought that whoever my soulmate was would be happy to meet me. That it would be love at first sight and we’d get married and live happily ever after. I was so stupid.”

“No you weren’t,” Felicity said quietly, her heart breaking as she wrapped an arm around Thea and pulled her close. “You were hopeful. Optimistic. That’s not a bad thing.”

“I should have known after watching mom and Tommy’s dad that nothing good could ever come out of soulmates,” Thea said softly.

Felicity wanted nothing more than to tell her that she was wrong. That sometimes soulmates weren’t so bad. That they become your best friend and all of a sudden the world is brighter and more beautiful and when you start falling for them it’s the most terrifying feeling in the universe but it’s also the best feeling. That nothing can compare to spending time with them, sharing laughs and inside jokes and soon every moment alone begins to pale in comparison to when you’re with them.

That when you suddenly realise you’re in love with them while eating takeout and sharing childhood stories and throwing pillows at one another is when you’ll feel most alive.

“It’s his loss,” is what she said instead.

Neither of them spoke for a little while as they simply relished in the comfort of having the other.

“Thanks,” Thea said finally. “For listening to me. For being here.”

“No problem,” Felicity replied with a smile.

“I’ve missed you,” Thea confessed.

“I missed you too,” Felicity responded, swallowing the lump in her throat.

She had never been more lonely than in the past week.

“Let’s not have things be weird between us okay?” Thea blurted out. “Just because things are messy between you and my brother doesn’t mean we can’t be friends right?”

“Right,” Felicity responded, beginning to feel truly happy for the first time since she pushed Oliver away.

“Come on. We still need to find dresses,” Thea stated, rising from her seat.

Felicity groaned as she got up.

“Can’t I just borrow something from you?” she whined.

“I don’t mind, in fact I’d take you to my closet right now but Oliver’s home and I have a feeling you wouldn’t want to go there right now.”

“Your feeling’s right,” Felicity mumbled.

“What happened between you two anyway?” Thea inquired curiously.

Felicity avoided her eyes as she contemplated on an answer.

How was she supposed to tell her that she screwed everything up? That she got scared and ran. That she deliberately shattered her brother’s heart.

How could she even begin to explain about the choices she made years ago and that as much as she wanted it to, nothing had changed.

“It’s okay,” Thea said suddenly, interrupting Felicity’s silence. “You don’t have to talk about it.”

“Thanks,” Felicity said softly.

And then the brunette was pulling her around the store again as they once more continued their search for the perfect dresses.

 

It was at the sixth store that Thea found a gorgeous strapless red dress that shimmered in the light and insisted it was perfect for Felicity. All it took was for her to try it on and she was doomed, instantly in love with the way it sparkled and hugged her body perfectly.

At the eighth, Thea finally found something she was satisfied with but just when Felicity began to sigh in relief, she announced that they still needed shoes.

Now, Felicity walked through the door, utterly exhausted.

“Hi Jenny,” Felicity greeted the nurse she had hired to look after her mother while she was away. “You can head out now.”

The older woman merely nodded in response, gathering her things.

“Have a great weekend!” she called as she stepped out the door.

As long as she had to go to that stupid thing tomorrow, Felicity’s weekend would not be great. She was dreading it even more now that everyone seemed to know that something had happened between her and Oliver. The whispers and gossip would be flying about like crazy.

But she replied with a polite “Thanks!” before she made her way into her mother’s room.

“Hey mom,” Felicity said.

“How many times do I have to tell you that I don’t need a babysitter,” Donna promptly responded, as she did every day.

And as usual, Felicity ignored her.

Her mother could move around a bit on her crutches but she was still a little shaky and Felicity didn’t want to think about what would happen if she had an accident and there was no one else at home.

And Donna didn’t know it but Jenny was also responsible for making sure that she didn’t so much as touch an alcoholic beverage.

“Let me see what you got,” Donna ordered, eyeing Felicity’s bags.

Felicity could see her basically drooling as she pulled out her dress.

“Oh my goodness that is beautiful.”

“I know right,” Felicity responded proudly.

She owed Thea her life for spotting this dress.

“You’re gonna take Oliver’s breath away in that,” Donna remarked all of a sudden and every single word was stolen from Felicity’s mouth.

“What?” she eventually sputtered, causing her mother to roll her eyes.

“Oh please. I don’t know what happened between you too but you obviously still have feelings for him.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Felicity insisted.

Donna shot her daughter her _don’t bullshit me_ look.

“I know you love him,” she declared.

“How can you possibly know that you met him once for like ten seconds,” Felicity countered.

“And I knew it in five. You lit up like Christmas when he walked in the room.”

Felicity looked down at her feet, refusing to meet her mother’s gaze. She knew how she felt about Oliver of course but she didn’t realise that Donna did too.

“He loves you too you know,” Donna said softly.

“And how do you know that?” Felicity sighed as she stared at her again.

“Because I see the way he looks at you.”

She paused for a moment, a wistful smile appearing on her features.

“Your father never looked at me like that.”

Felicity’s heart ached so much for her mother in that moment.

“Mom-” she began but Donna cut her off.

“Felicity I know you spent your whole life with a wall around you because you were always afraid of getting hurt. And I know that’s why you ran away after you first met Oliver. I never said anything because I knew it work out. And it did. You found him again and you fell in love with him. And you were so happy. I don’t know what happened but sweetheart you’ve been miserable without him. I want to see you happy again.”

Felicity let her mother’s words burn themselves into her brain as she walked over to the edge of her bed and sat down.

She had been happy. So happy. But happiness was fleeting.

“I told him that I didn’t have feelings for him,” she said quietly, finally admitting the events of that night. “I broke his heart.”

“Why?” Donna asked.

“Because you were right. I was scared. Of getting hurt.”

Donna found Felicity’s hand, lacing her fingers through hers.

“You’re not me Felicity. And Oliver’s not your father.”

“But you don’t know that he won’t ever leave. Accidents happen all the time you know what happened with his dad,” Felicity argued.

“But if something ever did happen you won’t become me. You’re so much stronger than I am.”

“Mom you’re strong too,” she said, her eyes starting to burn.

“No Felicity I’m not. You basically raised yourself after your father walked away and you took care of me too. You were just a little girl and instead of being there for you, I was leaning on you. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t say that,” Felicity whispered. “And you don’t have to apologise for anything I know how hard it was for you.”

“I know that you always hated soulmates because of what happened with me and your father,” Donna said, changing the subject and deciding that she didn’t have the strength to fight her daughter on this. “And that you think I never got my happy ending. But Felicity I did. My happy ever after was you.”

The tears that had been building up behind her eyes finally streamed down her cheeks as she was unable to hold them back any longer.

“Now I need you to go get yours,” Donna said softly.

Felicity nodded, unable to find her voice with her throat closed up.

Silently, she climbed into bed, resting her head on Donna’s shoulder as she mused over her words.

Her mother was right.

She made a mistake in letting go of Oliver. And she needed to fix it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is kinda messy but anyway here's chapter 7! Thanks for reading and being patient with my slow updates.


	8. Gone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> At the gala, things take a turn for the worst.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So it’s been two years and idek if anyone still cares about this but here’s an update lmao.

The last place in the world that Oliver wanted to be was at this gala. Oliver hated galas. Faking smiles and laugher in a room filled with power hungry vultures in disguise took a lot out of him. And of course there was the fact of Felicity's presence.

The moment he stepped into the room his eyes couldn't help but search the crowd for her. He'd found her almost instantly, talking to an investor, no doubt charming his pants off and Oliver was unable to stop the air from leaving his lungs.

_She was enchanting._

Her red dress clung to her body in the way his fingers did in his dreams. It sparkled in the light, matching her skin which seemed to glow as she lit up the entire event. Her hair was a waterfall and her lips were roses and all Oliver wanted to do was push her up against the wall and find out how long it would take to get her out of that dress while he smudged that perfect, perfect lipstick.

_He was a mess._

So now he stood by the little bar as he downed yet another drink, still watching her from a distance. He had barely taken his eyes off her for the entire night.

"She is beautiful," a very familiar voice suddenly said and Oliver didn't even have to turn his head to know that as per usual, Tommy had snuck up on him.

 _She's always beautiful_ Oliver wanted to say but those words weren't meant to come out of his mouth.

Instead he said nothing.

"Have you talked to her at all?" Tommy asked even though Oliver suspected he already knew the answer.

"No," Oliver mumbled, indulging his friend.

Tommy sighed in response.

Both men gazed at the blonde beauty of the night as she laughed wildly at something that Ray Palmer said to her. Oliver never really had much thoughts on the guy but right then he hated him. It was illogical and unfair but he didn't care. He fucking hated Palmer now.

"You know if you don't try to fix things soon then someone else is going to come along and sweep her off her feet like she deserves," Tommy said, looking in the same direction as Oliver.

"Good. She deserves someone better than me. She deserves someone like him," Oliver replied, half heartedly gesturing in Palmer's direction.

"But she doesn't _love_ him," Tommy bit out.

"She can."

"It won't be the same Oliver!" Tommy exclaimed, spinning to look his friend in the eye. "You're her soulmate. She's _your_ soulmate. Neither of you will be happy until you're together."

"You think that she can be happy with me?" Oliver asked with equal ferocity in his voice. "Look at her. She's light. She is bright and radiant and everything that is good in the world and I'm just a damaged man with too much emotional baggage. Besides she was the one who pushed me away and it was the best decision she ever could have made for herself."

"She was scared! That was the night she could have lost her mom and she got scared and ran because you're not the only one with emotional baggage. I know because it's what I would have done too. But the both of you need to get your heads out of your asses because I've seen enough of you to know that you two are miserable without each other. Talk to her Oliver."

Tommy's plea rang in Oliver's ears and every inch of him longed to do what he was told but love was about sacrifice and he had already pledged to not be selfish with her.

"I'm going to make my rounds," was all Oliver said as he pushed off from the counter and began making his way towards the crowd.

"I just want you to be happy Ollie," Tommy said quietly.

Oliver stopped in his tracks for a second before moving on, refusing to even turn around because he couldn't bear to see the sadness written on his friend's face because of him.

When would everyone learn that there was no such thing as happiness for Oliver Queen?

  
It wasn’t long before he had a nameless brunette hooked on his arm and when she pulled them in the direction of the bathrooms, locking them in a stall with a suggestive smile, he didn’t protest.

Her lips were on his and her hands roamed his body and god Oliver _tried_ to enjoy himself, _tried_ to let the alcohol in his veins do its job but all of his thoughts revolved around Felicity.

The only person he wanted was her.

_But he couldn’t have her._

So he hiked the woman’s dress up to her hips, his fingers on her inner thigh eliciting a moan from her throat.

Before he knew it she was unzipping his pants and all of a sudden he couldn’t do it anymore.

“Stop,” he said, grabbing her hands to stop her movements.

Her eyes were filled with questions as she looked at him in confusion.

Oliver couldn’t answer any of them.

“I can’t,” was all he told her. “I’m sorry.”

“Are you serious?” she asked incredulously.

The look he shot her in response was confirmation enough.

Shaking her head in disbelief, she pulled her dress back down before storming off. Oliver waited until the sound of her heels faded away before he stepped out.

A sigh escaped him as he stared at himself in the mirror, wondering what the hell had happened to him.

How did he become this?

 _Because you fell in love_ a voice in the back of his head whispered.

He ignored it as he straightened his suit jacket after fixing the rest of his clothes, making sure nothing was out of place. Satisfied that he didn’t look as if he had been up to anything, he made his way out of the bathroom.

His return to the gala wasn’t a moment too soon as he stepped into the room just as Walter was announcing the new tech the company was about to unveil.

It was supposed to be him up there but he couldn’t stand next to Felicity in front of everyone and pretend that everything was okay.

_He couldn’t pretend that he wasn’t breaking._

Work was hard enough already.

He couldn’t do it here too.

“And now, the brilliant mind behind this groundbreaking new piece of technology that will change life as we know it, Felicity Smoak!”

The applause that filled the space matched the beat of his heart that thundered in his chest.

However, Felicity never appeared.

Confused murmurs filled the room instead as Oliver headed towards Walter, trying to quell the panic that was already beginning to build in him.

“Where’s Felicity?” he asked, upon reaching the man.

“I don’t know,” Walter replied, looking as lost as everybody else. “I thought maybe you would know.”

A part of Oliver resisted the urge to laugh. He hadn’t known anything about Felicity’s whereabouts for a while now.

He pulled out his phone as he walked away, making his exit out into the hallway. His hands shook as he dialed her number, silently praying that she would pick up.

She didn’t.

Just like that, he couldn’t breathe.

“Oliver?”

He turned around to find Tommy and Thea, both of them seeming to be waiting for answers.

“She’s not answering her phone,” the words tumbled out of his mouth a million miles per second. “Felicity is never five feet away from her phone. Something’s wrong.”

A ribbon of fear wrapped itself around his heart, squeezing and squeezing until the ache in his chest spread throughout his entire body.

“Okay calm down,” Tommy said, recognizing that Oliver was this close to losing it. “I’m sure everything’s fine-”

“Something is wrong,” he repeated, steel coating every syllable.

_He could feel it._

She was in trouble.

Oliver dialed her number again because he didn’t know what else to do, his lungs constricting more and more with each ring.

“Damn it!” he exclaimed when it went to voicemail again.

He was ready to throw the device against a wall as desperation shot through him.

“Maybe something came up and she had to leave,” Thea suggested weakly even as worry marred her own features.

“She wouldn’t leave without telling anyone,” he replied, his tone clipped.

“How about we head downstairs and just ask around? See if anyone saw her or anything,” Tommy recommended.

Oliver wanted to do something more but he didn’t know what. He was fucking useless.

All of a sudden his phone blared, piercing the air around them and Oliver’s heart was in his throat as he saw the caller id.

 _Felicity_.

Immediately, he answered, struggling to find oxygen as he put the phone against his ear.

“Felicity?”

“I’m sorry she’s a little tied up at the moment,” a gruff voice replied.

Oliver’s entire universe came crashing down.

“Who is this?” he demanded. “Where is she?”

“She’s alive don’t worry. But how much is her life worth to you?”

 _Everything_.

“Name your price.”

“Seven million. You have forty eight hours. Further instructions will follow soon.”

The man hung up and Oliver’s limbs turned to jelly as he leaned against the wall for support.

“Ollie,” Thea said, placing her hand on his arm. “What is it?”

“She’s been kidnapped,” he said slowly, his brain trying to make sense of the situation because it was impossible. “They want seven million.”

_Things like this weren’t supposed to happen to people like her._

He was vaguely aware of Thea and Tommy’s voices as they responded to his declaration but they sounded as if they were underwater.

Or maybe that was him. He was drowning.

Felicity was taken. And it was all his fault. It was because she was his soulmate.

He knew that her being his soulmate put a target on her back but he never did a thing about it.

His hands and mouth had been all over another woman and all the while Felicity had been in danger.

_What if she was hurt?_

The thought entered his mind and his limbs completely gave out as he collapsed to the floor. The earth was spinning out of control and his vision was blurred as he choked on the noose around his neck.

Thea’s hands were on his face, forcing him to look at her as she knelt down next to him.

“Ollie breathe,” she commanded.

He tried to listen as he stared into those unfamiliar eyes but it was too much _everything was too goddamn much_.

“She’s going to be okay.”

 _You don’t know that_ Oliver wanted to say but he still couldn’t speak.

 _It was all his fault_.

The sentence kept repeating in his head like a broken record.

Black spots danced at the edge of his line of sight before his eyes fell shut, his body giving out on him. The last thing he heard was Tommy’s voice in the background as he contacted SCPD, before the whole world faded away.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had started writing this chapter ages ago and gave up and I found it last night ended up somehow finishing it. I haven’t written olicity in almost a year so sorry if it sucks. Idk yet if I’m going to keep continuing but we’ll see...? Anyway if anyone’s still out there thanks for reading!


	9. The End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felicity wakes up in a strange place and realises she’s been taken.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so warning: there’s some violence in this chapter so please proceed with caution.

The first thing Felicity noticed upon waking up was that she couldn’t move.

Her chest instantly seized as something rough dug into her wrists.

_She was tied to a chair._

Automatically, she tried to scream for help only to discover she was gagged.

Panic was quickly rising within her but she forced it down, taking in her surroundings as she tried to figure out where she was.

She could barely make out a thing in the low light but from the dilapidated walls and old equipment, she discerned that she was in an abandoned warehouse or something.

_There were only a million of those in Starling City._

Briefly, Felicity wondered why her captors hadn’t blindfolded her too. From all the crime dramas she watched on tv and the novels she read she knew that they never let their victims see their faces unless they didn’t plan on letting them live.

Her lungs constricted as her brain whispered that she was going to die.

_Everything’s going to be okay._

Desperately, she repeated the thought like a mantra as she struggled to quiet her racing heart.

It wasn’t working.

“Look who’s awake,” a gruff voice penetrated the silence.

Her heart thundered in her chest.

A man with grey eyes stepped into view.

He walked towards her, cupping her face in his hand. His fingertips against her skin sent waves of revulsion through her body.

She was going to throw up.

“Aren’t you a pretty thing,” he muttered, staring at her as if she was his next meal.

For all Felicity knew, she certainly might be.

“Leave her alone,” another voice filled the space as a man in a ratty t-shirt appeared. “Queen’s paying good money for her _safe_ return.”

His companion sighed before dropping his hand and walking away.

Felicity tried to get oxygen into her system as she mulled over what she had heard.

 _Oliver_.

They took her because she was his soulmate.

She wondered how much they were asking him for.

Felicity knew Oliver well enough to know that he would drain his entire bank account for her.

She also knew that he was probably blaming himself for this.

And even though she was tied up with no idea of where she was, unsure of her own fate, she couldn’t help but worry about him.

Tonight was supposed to be the night that she fixed things.

In fact, she was going to. After spending half the night trying to gather her courage while flitting from one meaningless person to the next, she had finally decided to talk to him.

But then she spotted him disappearing down the hall with a sexy long legged woman on his arm and her heart plummeted all the way to her stomach.

So she had stepped outside, trying to breathe and think and just be okay because she couldn’t do any of that with countless eyes on her.

Yet she hadn’t even made it two steps into the parking lot when suddenly someone was grabbing her and she couldn’t make a sound with the hand over her mouth and then the world went black.

She let her eyes fall shut for a moment as she tried her best to keep it together.

_She would be okay._

Without a doubt, Felicity knew that Oliver was doing everything in his power to get her back. And she had complete faith in him.

_Everything would be alright._

  
Felicity wasn’t sure how many hours she had spent in captivity. She only knew when the night had ended because of the sunlight that poured in through the little window in the corner of the room.

A dull ache had formed in her muscles and she was hungry and thirsty and _really_ needed to pee.

One thing she was thankful for however was that the men had left her alone so far. She had tried to gather more pieces of information from their conversations but they were careful about what they said in her presence.

Her eyes were beginning to fall shut because despite her uncomfortable conditions, exhaustion was slowly overtaking her.

All of a sudden, the grey eyed man stepped into the room and every ounce of oxygen instantly left her body.

A smile appeared on his weathered face as he met her gaze and alarm bells began ringing out of control in her head.

Her heartbeat roared in her ears as he walked towards her.

“Oliver Queen really is a lucky man,” he said softly, drinking her in for the millionth time.

He reached out and Felicity automatically closed her eyes as fear quickly encompassed every crevice of her being.

In one swift motion, he rid her of the cloth tied around her mouth.

Her eyes flew open.

“That’s better,” he mumbled, before tracing her lips with his thumb.

A shudder ran through her as disgust pooled in the pit of her stomach.

He stared at her intently, almost as if lost in a trance.

Without warning, he leaned in, fiercely pressing his lips against hers.

A scream rose within Felicity but not a sound was heard as he harshly gripped her face in his rough hands.

She couldn’t move. She couldn’t breathe. She couldn’t do anything.

Tears streamed down her cheeks while she struggled against the ropes that held her, knowing her efforts were futile.

She had never felt so helpless in her entire life.

Panic tightly wound itself around her chest as each of her senses was assaulted by the man who had her in his grasp.

One of his hands began sliding down her body and the terror running through her quickly intensified.

Every nightmare she ever had was coming true.

Devoid of any thought, something deep inside her acted on instinct and managed to capture his bottom lip between her teeth. And then she bit down. _Hard_.

A cry escaped from his throat as he pulled away, his fingers flying to his mouth.

“You fucking bitch!”

Meanwhile, Felicity struggled to catch her breath.

Her vision was blurred from the tears that refused to stop falling but she was still able to recognize the pure anger that had taken up residence in those steely eyes.

As he glared at her with hatred, Felicity’s fear increased tenfold.

Before she knew what was happening, the man’s fist was colliding with her face.

It took a second to register that he had hit her as she stared at a spot on the floor, too afraid to even move.

She felt blood dripping from her nose that was on fire and a tiny voice managed to break through her shell shocked haze to whisper that it was probably broken.

But that was the least of her worries right now.

She couldn’t help but brace herself for another blow, still unable to move a muscle.

“What the hell?”

The sudden exclamation of her other kidnapper as he entered the room made her jump out of her skin.

“Calm down. Queen will pay for her as long as she’s alive. You’ll get your money,” his partner said, a trace of annoyance in his tone.

“I don’t give a rat’s ass Vic. I specifically told you-”

“I didn’t realise I take orders from you now,” Vic interrupted, walking up to the other man and meeting his gaze.

The air was heavy with tension as they glared at each other and Felicity found herself waiting with bated breath to see what would occur next.

Much to her surprise, it was Vic who retreated, taking a step back before turning around and exiting the room.

Relief automatically filled her.

The other man took her in then, his eyes lingering on the damage done to her face. A sigh escaped him as he stared at her with an expression that almost resembled pity.

But if he really was sorry, she wouldn’t have been there in the first place.

He situated himself in the corner of the room, typing away on his burner phone. Time slipped through her fingers as she lost herself in her mind, her thoughts spiraling this way and that. She only half paid attention as the man left the room and reentered a few times.

She didn’t have the energy to try and figure anything out anymore.

So she simply waited for the worst, not daring to hope for anything else.

However it didn’t escape her notice when all of a sudden her captor grabbed his laptop and began frantically typing. She watched as his eyes were glued to the screen and her heart rate immediately picked up.

_Something was happening._

In an instant, he shut the device before putting it away in a bag and slinging it over his shoulder.

“Vic!” he called, standing and making his way to the middle of the room.

Unease filled her again as the man in question walked in.

“Queen transferred the money into the account,” his partner informed him. “Time to drop her off and get the hell out of this goddamn city.”

The hope that Felicity hadn’t wanted to feel blossomed deep within her.

_She was going home._

“Sorry Daniel,” Vic said, causing a block of ice to form in her stomach. “But you’re not going anywhere.”

Daniel blinked in confusion before Vic pulled out his gun and pointed it right in the middle of his forehead. The earth stopped spinning as he pulled the trigger.

The gunshot echoed throughout the entire building, mixing with the horrified scream that was torn from Felicity’s throat.

Daniel’s mouth was open, a look of surprise written on his features as he crumpled to the floor like a mere rag doll. A pool of blood promptly began forming around him.

Not wasting a second, Vic bent down to retrieve the laptop bag before heading in her direction.

Felicity’s attention was split between the body that she couldn’t stop staring at and the man who was probably going to butcher her.

“You’re mine now,” he whispered in her ear before getting to work on the knots around her wrists and ankles.

Three words that were a death sentence.

They replayed in her brain over and over, background music to the scene starring the corpse that was now permanently engraved in her memory.

Felicity had never even seen a dead body before.

She had never so much as been to a funeral.

Her mother’s parents had died before she was born and she had never known any of her father’s family.

Yet somehow fate had been written so that she of all people, the most mundane woman, would witness a murder first hand.

She almost laughed.

She was losing her mind.

All of a sudden Vic grasped her arm and hauled her to her feet. She stumbled, her legs stiff from being in one position for so long. However he didn’t seem to care as he roughly pulled her along.

Abruptly, he pushed her against the wall, one hand wrapped around her throat while the other pointed his gun to her stomach.

Felicity’s breathing immediately became erratic as she stared at the weapon that dug into her skin.

She was going to die.

“I’m letting you know that if you pull any shit like earlier I will kill you,” he snarled, “Understand?”

Felicity hadn’t remembered how to speak yet so she simply stared at him, every call in her body protesting against his touch.

“I said do you understand?” he repeated, fingers tightening around her throat.

At some point tears had started falling again and in the midst of her blurry vision, she managed to nod.

“Good,” he whispered, resting his forehead against hers.

His breath mingled with her own as his lips were mere inches from hers and Felicity knew she would rather die than have him kiss her again.

But there wasn’t a thing she could do, pinned against the damn wall, always unable to move so she braced herself for the inevitable.

She waited for another piece of her soul to be chipped away.

All of a sudden, a loud crash echoed throughout the building.

“SCPD!” immediately followed the noise. “Put your hands where I can see them and step away from the woman.”

_They found her._

She was about to thank every single higher power that existed when she noticed the glint in Vic’s eyes.

 _No_.

The gunshot rang in her ears, the sound tangling with her screams for the second time that day as pain quickly ran through her.

Felicity was vaguely aware of a second shot and Vic falling to the floor but her eyes were glued to the blood that was rapidly spreading over her stomach.

Her legs gave out as she sank to the floor, her body on fire.

“Hey everything’s going to be alright,” said a cop who materialized next to her. “Ambulance is on its way. I just need you to stay with me okay. You’re going to be fine.”

Felicity wanted to tell her that she was wrong but she couldn’t get the words out.

She couldn’t even breathe.

_She was going to die here._

“Oliver,” she mumbled weakly, using up every bit of her energy just to get those three syllables out.

She never told him she loved him. Now he would never know.

It was too late.

“You’ll see your soulmate soon I promise,” the cop said reassuringly.

That was a promise she wasn’t going to be able to keep

Felicity managed to grab a hold of the woman’s arm, her touch filled with urgency.

“You need to tell him...”

Breathing was becoming more difficult by the second. She could already feel herself beginning to slip away.

_Not yet._

“Save your strength,” said the officer.

Felicity all but ignored her.

“I love him,” she breathed out, frantically squeezing her arm. “You need to tell him. That I love him.”

“You will tell him yourself,” was the woman’s stern reply.

There was nothing more in the world that Felicity wanted than to have the chance to do that.

She wanted to spend her whole life with Oliver Queen.

Unfortunately it was too goddamn late.

They both fucked up and now here they were, ending before they had even truly begun.

She knew it was her fault for running when she had gotten scared.

But hell he pushed her away too.

_I’m sorry._

The thought repeated itself in her head and she wished she could have told him that too.

She wished they had more time.

Maybe they were just doomed from the start.

Maybe they never stood a chance in the first place.

Spots danced at the edge of her vision as the seconds slipped through her fingers.

This was the ending of everything.

Her eyes fell shut as she felt her body giving out.

She couldn’t do it anymore.

So when death swooped in holding out his bony arm, Felicity accepted it, letting the darkness consume her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the most dramatic ass bullshit I’ve ever written but it’s where my muse took me. I struggled to write this which is why the wait was so long and idek how I feel about it but whatever. Also I need to thank you all so much for the overwhelming response on the last update. I didn’t really expect much from an update after two years but wow you guys actually left me speechless. I kept reading all those comments over and over to motivate me whenever I got stuck (which was a lot). Thank you so much for still sticking with this story and thank you for the encouragement to keep working on it. All of your comments mean the world to me.

**Author's Note:**

> I started writing this in January but then got stuck halfway through for months. Anyway it's finally finished and was definitely better in my head but I hope everyone likes it anyway.


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